No, this week I have been hugely distracted by the Playstation2 game God Of War 2.
I realise I have my thumb spectacularly on the pulse with this one considering it was released over four years ago, but it was still a nice surprise when LoveFilm pleasantly dropped this through the letterbox last week. Nice because the game has turned out to be brilliant, but still mainly a surprise because a) I didn't realise it was on my rentals list and b) I've been waiting for them to deliver Fallout New Vegas for about 4 months now.
Still, I can continue waiting for New Vegas whilst games like this arrive. I had the bonus of not knowing a thing about the game before loading up the dusty PS2 but thankfully the game delves right in, and within a minute of hitting New Game you're battling a newly-anthropomophic Colossus of Rhodes.
That's right, the fucking Colossus of Rhodes is the first opponent in the game.
Not even arsed.
After defeating this bronze behemoth with your handy pair of steak knives on strings you're up and on a quest to change your fate (by "your" I mean Kratos, the perpetually angry and perpetually bald protagonist) and defeat the Gods of Olympia etc and so on. It's a long quest, I shan't lie, but it's ok because seemingly every few minutes you're thrust into yet another legendary battle. Minutes after fist-fucking Cerebrus to death to regain the golden fleece you're kicked off on by Medusa's less-famous-but-more-ugly sister. After defeating a Spartan general you're attacked from behind by the fucking Kraken, anachronistic but still huge and a right bloody bastard. And you're still only about two-thirds though the game.
I don't mean to namedrop like an excitable Classics student but the amount of mythology the game includes is admirable; Perseus, Thesus, Zeus, Titan and friends are all included in one way or another, with the game's overarching storyline fitting nicely alongside the existing Greek mythos.
The level design is deceptively clever - after heading one way for a few hours you're occasionally brought back into an area you visited earlier from a different direction that didn't even seem possible the first time. There are very few loading screens, due to the well-paced employment of cutscenes and FMV, and as such the game flows from one area into another almost seamlessly. The sound is suitably bombastic, with huge scores to complement the action. The voice-acting is gruff and almost-overcooked but fits the game's environment well.
The combat is the real highlight of God of War 2, though. It's practically non-stop (aside from when solving the game's occasional just-tough-enough puzzles) and whilst it may lend itself to sporadic button-bashing when outnumbered, it's instantly redeemed by the number of powerful moves you can unleash - including several different ways of finishing off each individual enemy type, like a particularly pissed-off hairless Mortal Kombat character. Major boss battles make use of Quick Time Events, yet these don't detract from fights and complement the almost-mindless hacking and slashing.
Some battles can get overcrowded and it's tempting to panic a tad; thankfully though it's the exhilarating sort of panic like when you drive a car for the first time, rather than the stressed panic when your girlfriend tells you she's late and you're only 19 with a shit retail job and you were supposed to be going to uni in a few months and how are you going to LIVE?!
God of War 2 is easily the most fun I've had with a game for years, with about 20 hours or so of ass-kicking gameplay. I'm loathe to use the word "epic" but from the setting and story, to the gameplay, to the sheer size of the levels and bosses, it's the best word to accurately sum it up. The game is like a cross of 300 and a Jason Statham film, except angrier, balder and with bigger fight scenes. And every bit as adrenaline-charged and exciting as that sounds.
I just wish I had a Playstation 3 to play the cocking sequel.
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